MikWright has an off-kilter greeting for any birthday or all-occasion need.

random quips make your card choice stand out and provoke “something.” crack open a box of wine. peruse. proceed.

 
 

all occasion

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112 - jello / bitch please
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142 - deviled egg carrier
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143 - big. bigger. just right.
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148 - zinnias
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154 - no underwear
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156 - rat's ass
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168 - in retrospect
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171 - shrimp on the buffet
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188 - welcome to alabama
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203 - fashion first
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236 - margaritas
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239 - makeup is all wrong
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242 - don't blame me wanda
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260 - whatever it is
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267 - get laid on
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268 - doublewide conception
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274 - running down the other leg
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279 - love hurts
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288 - reptile dysfunction
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290 - come out with your hands up
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291 - brides clinical trials
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294 - showing his wiener
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295 - lester / lube joint
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300 - mel-vin / rectal scale
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301 - decorate it
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302 - never meant to work
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312 - turn the world on
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313 - tall, dark, on top of me
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314 - little blue pill
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318 - what's making you wheeze
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324 - straight to time out
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332 - rainbow flag
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333 - homework/refill themselves
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338 - grandma farts
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340 - start with her 'do'
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341 - my job to disappoint
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342 - bitch mode
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343 - a word with your son
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344 - constipated the marriage
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345 - fifteen minutes
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346 - flight attendant slapped
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347 - simon says
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350 - oh my god
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355 - sex is beneath me
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358 - the note inside said
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361 - hello vodka
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363 - flatulates 14 times a day
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364 - did you get his last name
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366 - looking for a problem
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367 - mile high club
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372 - it finally dawned on me
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373 - liquid assets
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374 - even farts the blues
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375 - show me yours
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376 - think's he's straight
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377 - marked the spot
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379 - hell of a guy
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380 - toilet seat down
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381 - menopausal mama
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382 - weekends and holidays off
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383 - love for sale
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384 - seriously?
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385 - medical marijuana card
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386 - unfriending you
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387 - directly beneath the boss
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389 - if i were any gassier
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390 - not into grills
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391 - don't i look gorgeous
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392 - livin la vida
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393 - nasty oral habit
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394 - cookie exchange
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395 - premarital sex
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396 - blue jumper
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397 - exhilarating / exhausting
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398 - feel a sin
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399 - marry for brains
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400 - throw on a tube top
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402 - counting carbs
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403 - small dingy
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404 - i've become my mother
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405 - drinkin' single
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406 - buy another bowel
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407 - shit out of her closet
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408 - equally annoying
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409 - blocking the beer
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410 - something stuffed
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411 - speed dating beaver lodge
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412 - cheat sooner
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413 - mood ring chardonnay
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414 - new norm
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415 - get this over with
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416 - pull your own finger
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417 - slap and tickle
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418 - trouble in paradise
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419 - in my office
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420 - one little mistake
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421 - working from home
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422 - we're not stupid
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423 - casual friday
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424 - oh, hell no
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426 - waving that thing in my face
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427 - coffee / prune juice
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428 - not enough middle fingers
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429 - dance like everyone's watching
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430 - put the election behind
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431 - debby did dallas
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432 - see something... say something
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433 - chase my tail
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434 - crap on your phone
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435 - global warming
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436 - username password
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437 - flying these days
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